Letting go sucks so it must be love

 

Giving up on ideas is as easy as saying Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious
“Supercali-“
“Hold on loosely, but don’t let go.”

I think most everybody born before the year 2000 knows of the song by 38 Special. Call me a rock traitor if you will, but I hate that song.

Just not for why you might think. My hate stems from my inability to let go.

Successful application of the concept, my letting go, is as easy for me, as it would be for you to say…

“Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!”

 

Looks and letting go can be deceptive
Yeah, sure. Doesn’t look too scary…

 

In its complete entirety with your mouth stuffed full of Saltine crackers, while your body is rocketing down the Schlitterbahn water slide at speeds alternating between the mild, ‘Non-surgical face-lift’ and the more exhilerating, ‘high colonic via bathing suit’.

Because I’m betting the odds of your being successful in verbalizing anything other than AAHH!!, much less all those troublesome syllables during your date with terror and g-forces in a clearly vain attempt to recapture your youthful glory and and that of my letting go with any modicum of grace and dignity are…

I’m thinking are roughly about the same.

It’d be easier for all of us if I were to cut to the chase and state that the aforementioned lack thereof doesn’t happen to be on the list with the rest of my various and many splendored talents.

Heh.

The fact is, it’d be much more accurate for me to admit that I’m downright terrible at it.

Because you might get a few syllables out on that ride to meet your thrill destiny but my having to say the words “Bye, Duck, I love you.”

Then letting him go and not wanting to cry, well…isn’t looking like its going to get any easier.

Duck in the pool
Duck is so much fun now

Maybe its my having ADHD and the big emotions that come with it. My having to feel everything more intensely than everyone else (makes me the life of every party, yannow).

Maybe because Duck is growing so fast now and I enjoy being with him so much, maybe both, all or neither, who knows?

I can tell you the sun shines less brightly when the car door closes.

That the day doesn’t feel quite the same.

The low whisper of what good things may come and possibilities of cool stuff to explore, that is, if you just believe, fade away to a pained silence instead.

Letting go

The waiting for his return begins. And yeah, it sucks.

It’s gotta be love to suck that bad.

 

So there are other lessons in letting go I’m having to learn this summer. Some stuff ranking really high on the suckage meter and some not so.

I’ll be here as much as I can and blogging about things decidedly less sucky, just not as often as I’d like.

I’ll  be trying to answer and leave comments but will be more delayed than usual. No worries, just life related suckage. 

Sincerely,
CeeLee

 

 

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17 thoughts on “Letting go sucks so it must be love”

    1. Hey Mike,
      Yup, I think so.
      Gives me a whole new appreciation for using the word “suck” and not even grinning (much) lol

    1. I’ll still be doing the award CeeLee style,(like there’s any other way) Shey. No worries. Okay, yeah, there’s one. Can I do it next week? 😉

  1. Ah the love of a mother it is so precious.
    My mum could not wait to send me off. But if I was away for a week the first thing she does is cry and saying I am snitty kid when I get back Imagine that. She missed my ass for sure.

    1. A Crow flies within a 6 mile radius of it’s nest, rarely venturing further than that. If the article I read about Crow’s is true. Much to be said for home. 🙂

  2. Bidding the Duck fairwell, my heart goes out to you with the hopes that the time till his next return flies on the wings of the wind.

    1. Thank you Forrest, it’s been a rather bumpy summer hasn’t it? So much… fun packed into so many learning…experiences. And such a long way to go remains.
      hmmm….maybe I should consider moving to Hell’s Home. Might be the vacation I need. lol

  3. Letting go well…sucks.
    Maybe it IS the ADHD and the whole feeling emotions too strongly thing, but honestly, the world is a different place when my kid isn’t here. I don’t like it. Harder now because she’s getting older and being more independent, which should be a GOOD thing, but it makes it even harder to let her go because I am so used to her being right here by my side all the time. So I fret too much, I miss her too much, and I’m already starting to hate that the growing up part is starting to take her on her own path now, which in my HEAD I know that it’s right and proper and that it’s what I’ve been PREPARING her for, but it still well…sucks.
    Yep, my friend, it’s love. 😉

    1. Okay Kristi, did we swap brains for a moment? LoL
      Yes. Yes to all of those thoughts and emotions, all so much more eloqouently phrased than my own attempts, I might add.
      Jerky as it might sound, it really is comforting knowing I’m not alone. Misery does enjoy entertaining after all, but still. It sucks. 😉

    2. Not so sure about the eloquent part, but some days I do feel like we are thinking the same thoughts. Poor you, I’m desperately sorry for that! Lol! Even when the thoughts are rotten ones it’s nice to know someone else has them too! 🙂

    3. I still say you rock the eloquence Kristi 😉 No need for worries though. I’m just happy being understood. Great writing BTW, on both of your blogs. I’ll be visiting shortly, I’ve got to let a laptop cool down 1st (She’s wired like a Christmas tree, so don’t give me too many bumps Cap’n) Oh man! I’m showing my Star Trek again! How embarrassing….aheh…scuz me 😉

    1. Yes, exactly. Sensitivity is a double-edged sword, isn’t it? At least that’s how I view it.

      Well that, or a walking giant nerve, all exposed and raw. As imagery goes, I tend to lean more towards the sword. Personally speaking. 😉

  4. Unfortunately, I can honestly say that the letting go sucks does not get any better when your kids are in their 30’s and 40’s😔 as mine are. I moved away, across the country, to allow them the opportunity to have a life without me in it on a day to day basis. Good for them…major suck factor for me! But their independence is more important than my propensity for holding on for dear life…after all, my job as a parent is to make sure they can live life to it’s fullest and feel that sense of accomplishment independently. And yes, I do realize the gesture is one of those “cut off your nose to spite your face”, over-the-top, dramatic and extreme things ADDers tend to do. On the plus side, the visits are extremely happy too, every precious moment swells the heart with pure, unadulterated love and not a single moment of annoyance😃

    1. Hey there!
      Great to hear from you and sorry for my delayed response. (Long story, involves a toe and my laptop and neither come off as a winner)
      Anyhoo…lol I figured as much, how it doesn’t get much easier as the kiddos grow up and move on. I suppose it makes the times you see them all the more special though, right? I hope? 😉

    2. Yes, it is with overwhelming joy they are welcomed and devastating sadness when they leave. Feelings always remain too intense…oh well, on the bright side, my children always know they are loved and cherished.

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