Observations fresh from the water park

ADHD observations from the water park
Not nearly enough payback for the coaster kerfuffle

 

Duck, The Redneck, and I went to Holiday World as a end of summer daycation. It was their idea, I didn’t really want to go. I cited my reasons, (excuses) the heat index, blah blah, but the real reason was that I had myself a whoppin’ case of middle-aged bathing suit anxiety.

Duck and The Redneck were unsympathetic.

Of course.

So this is…

What I learned about bathing suit fears at the water park

Guess what? Not one single person I saw there was a perfect 10. Of course it could be that it was the Victoria Secret models day off or something, or I wasn’t looking in the right direction at the right time for the shy and elusive tenners, who knows.

1. Everywhere I looked, body flaws were on flagrant display and Nobody. Cared.

No, seriously.

I saw several third nipples, always a wonderful if slightly dangerous, wish-we-all-were-so-lucky perennial conversation starter, tons of I-know-there-must-be-a-story-behind-this tattoos in interesting and unexpected locations, and plenty of successful (and unsuccessful) dislodging the suit buttcrack ballet maneuvers going on.

Hell yeah.

2. To my amazed delight, I most certainly wasn’t the only one with eye wateringly bright white summer denied skin. Far from it.

3. Not a single one of my fears came true. Nowhere was anyone was having a surprise swim suit inspection, everyone came sunglasses prepared, so there were no acrimonious accusations of spontaneous blindness or threats of seeking the advice of an attorney and best of all, being a 10 to gain admittance was not a requirement.

No one’s looking at you when there are friends doing the less than graceful, drowned rat water slide dismount off The Mammoth to howl insults at, a wave pool to dunk your kids in, either for general purposes or perhaps in payback over the regrettable and hopefully soon to be forgotten roller coaster incident.

And having the convenient option of having giant Tiki buckets nearby that dump a gazillion gallons of water from high above, to stand them under, you know…if the wave pool isn’t enough closure is a plus. Not that I’m saying I did that or anything.

Yeah with all that going on, well, you’re just part of the crowd getting sunburnt to an extra-crispy cinder in the background. For a people watching introvert with bathing suit anxieties, that ain’t half bad.

bad sunburns suck
After liberal coating in waterproof Coppertone, I might have a whole new face in a few weeks
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14 thoughts on “Observations fresh from the water park”

    1. Busted!
      Yes Ralphie, its a speedo blush for sure. Man are you good or what? Cross country vision, that’s Ralph lol

  1. Thanks Kristi, that means tons coming from you 🙂
    When I realized no one cared about appearances, it become so much more fun. Go figure lol

  2. No one cares about apperances, I would have not guessed ~~makes note~~ being a people watching swim suit introvert myself ~~sends out our club welcome letter and gift package~~ that gift pack includes a little sample of sun block, just enough to cover the back of your hand. I have not been seen in public in a swim suit in more years than i can remember.

    Funny thing about all the Duck dunking, I always thought ducks liked water, but if I know a cat that likes water then there could be a duck that likes water less. 🙂

    1. The basket comes with a no-no suit crack rider band? (okay it sounded better in my head) Awesome! No more having to pirouette around to yank it back down where it needs to be, thank you Forrest. 😉

      Nice to be a part of a cool club like this, cant go wrong with sunblock, judging by my Walking Dead appearance at the moment. As for Duck, he loves water but had no idea of what a wave pool was heh…so I introduced him to it and karma did the rest 😉

  3. In early July I found a nice secluded beach (not easy in central Indiana) and coated myself with some 20 year old Hawaiin Tropics SPF-1 and set about working on my tan – weeks later after nursing wall-to-wall crispyness and finally shedding my outer layers I ended up with a pretty good tan. I was not as self conscious on trips to the more populates swimming holes. People seem to be alot more willing to forgive bodily imperfections if it has a really good suntan… but then again, people are basically idiots 😉
    Anyway… Holiday World? that’s getting into my neighborhood – Should have come on up – you are always welcome to pitch a tent in the yard 😀

    1. I wish I were so lucky as to shed (2 so far but who’s counting) my layers and reveal a nice tan hiding underneath.
      Oh for petes sake, who am I kidding? Any colors other than fire engine red, are ya sun poisoned and dyin’ red-purple, or Casper isnt this white would be a nice change. 😉

      Thank you kindly for the offer, I’ll extend the same tent pitching…that doesn’t sound right…offer to you guys, should you happen to catch some Thunder or Derby fever lol

  4. Hey there such a nice experience CeeLee contrary to what we usually hear from people! ^_^
    How are you doing by the way? Sorry I didn’t get to check up on here due to my 3-6 months hiatus cuz of exams and studies…Wishing you luck and Much love,
    Zee ❤

    1. Study and exam hiatuses are okay here, Zee. No worries, you’re always welcomed here, you know that right? 😉

      Hope all the exams went well for you.
      And yeah. The water park managed to surprise me. In a good way. For once 😉

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