It’s probably me, but why


I'm asking questions

It’s Tuesday already and I’ve got questions.

Like why oh why…

  • Does my Hulu only have trouble buffering during the actual show? Because the commercials never suffer from performance anxiety.
  • Do people in the car ahead of me wait to slam the brakes until the exact moment I’ve shifted to 6th gear? Are they plain jane haters or psychic haters?
  • Does the temperature change from a month of upper 70’s to 40’s the moment I decide that I can’t stand frying another stinkin’ second longer and put the a/c window unit back in?
  • Do my socks always make it in the laundry hamper but the Redneck and Duck’s get denied? Usually by a whole room away?
  • Does my cell phone never ring unless I’m in the shower? Does the shower sound an alarm?
  • Is a customer service call answered within the first 5 minutes of being placed the only time I don’t have my account number in front of me? Must be customer service karma for all the times I’ve muttered discouraging things under my breath while listening to the elevator version of Uptown Funk.

These are my burning questions burning a hole through my brain as I’m working my way back into the Pool groove.








10 thoughts on “It’s probably me, but why”

  1. I will take these questions on one at a time.

    ~ Hulu wants to force feed you commercials, you gotta be a consumer, buy buy buy. But they only spoon feed the shows because well because they can,

    ~ Look at the driver in the car in front of you. If it is an old man wearing a hat or a woman whose head you can not see, also known as a phantom driven car, then back off slooooooowly. These people are going to slam on their brakes as soon as they think they see a Waffle House or Country Buffet. Use extreme caution around them.

    ~ Sorry but I blame you for the AC issue, you should not take the AC out of the window until there is enough snow on the ground to shovel. Then while you are taking the AC unit out of the window you will appreciate the cool air after teh heavy work out from shoveling.

    ~ Your socks make it to the hamper because you are in the right temporal space. The Red Neck and Duck are temporally side stepped making them hit the right spot in the wrong room.

    ~ Your cell phones ringer is steam activated. I suggest keeping it sitting next to a boiling pot of water, preferable one that is intended for making your favorite tea.

    ~ Customer service is connected to the NSA and have access to your web cam, counter cam, ATM cam, dash cam and traffic light cam. They know when you are not ready and answer their phones immediately just to put you on the defensive right from the start.

    I hope this helps in putting out the fire that is burning your brain. It has more likely put you a step closer to thinking that I am out of my mind.

    1. Aha! This clears up so much.
      Who knew that temporal spaces were so strong, that Hulu is so evil or that my cell has a steam activated alarm and customer service so tricky?

      Okay, yeah, I’ll take the rap on the a/c but to anyone driving behind me in the hammer lane, phantom or not-you have been warned πŸ˜‰

  2. How can you tell if it IS you or simply the world out to get you? I should not answer a question with a question so I will just leave you with this thought… I don’t think you are out of your mind but you are setting awfully close to the edge on that upstairs window sill πŸ˜›

    1. I’m thinking it’s the whole world out to get me type of deal.
      Could be me and I could be wrong, but that window sill seems to be
      calling me to come closer…no harm shall come to me…just lean out a bit…further…

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